My Bridge

I've made some bad decisions in my life, more than I care to recall or recant.  But, a few years ago, I found myself standing at a canyon, looking at the beautiful wonderland on the other side wide-eyed and hopeful.  The only way to that side, though, was an unsteady rope bridge.  I prayed, "God, can't you make this easier?"  He asked me, "How bad do you want it, Tami?"  Trust me when I say, I looked all OVER that side of the canyon for safe passage down so as to avoid that test.  And, I found myself back at the bridge.  So I took a step.  My heart was pounding, my hands were sweaty, and everything in me said, "Get off this bridge! Go back to where it's safe!"  And then, I looked up, and God was smiling at me. I looked down, and my feet were planted securely on a plank of gold.  When it came time for me to take another step, same thing...heart was pounding, mind was racing...and while I was scared to do it again, I knew God was with me the last time, and I knew He'd be there again. 

Today after church, I wanted to work out in the worst way.  I needed to get my heart rate up, needed to sweat, needed to get off the mat and today was the day.  All I could think of was, "Is it safe, now, to get back my membership?  What if....What if...what if...."  Then, I remembered my bridge.   And all at once, it came to me.  I don't HAVE to buy a monthly membership...I had enough cash in my wallet to pay for a one-day entrance!  It was like a light came on in my head. I had been doing such black-and-white thinking, I hadn't even considered that as an option.  Change-in-perspective MUCH? 

That was all it took.  I was dressed and out the door quick as a flash.  When I hopped on that bike, I felt like I'd sat down for coffee with an old friend.  I remembered why I had started my journey;  I remembered how much enjoyment I had when I worked out; I remembered the sense of pride I had in myself.  When I stood in front of the mirror by the free weights, I saw myself with new eyes.  And, I smiled. 

So, I left the gym with a renewed membership.  I took another step on my bridge, and guess what...today? It felt REALLY good.  Today, I was not fearful, and God and I had one helluva good workout. :)